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Brother Rice Catholic High School: A Bevy of Manly Swimmers
"Brother Rice High School: Act Manfully in Christ Jesus."I'm all for acting manfully, especially if these are the guys who are doing the acting. Brother Rice is "Chicagoland's Premiere Catholic...
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The Swimmer with the Chest in Lutcher, Louisiana
Lutcher, Louisiana, population 3,000, is a penis-shaped town on the Mississippi, about 50 miles west of New Orleans. Named after Henry J. Lutcher, who ran a sawmill there. Half black, half white,...
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Daniel Boone: a Big Man
Daniel Boone was a man --He was a big man!Sounds good so far. When I was seven or eight years old, I was all for watching tv shows about a man, especially a big man. Especially a big man who was a...
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Gay Subtexts in "Lovecraft Country"
Although I have undergraduate and graduate degrees in literature, I don't read much literature any more. The few times that I've picked up novels, swayed by rave reviews, I'm inevitably disappointed;...
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"Await Further Instructions": Await Further Beefcake
The Netflix movie Await Further Instructions (2018) stars cleancut, extremely buffed young Nick (Sam Gittins), who brings his new girlfriend Annji (Neerja Naik) home to meet the folks at Christmastime....
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How is Big Boy Big?
"Big Boy" is the mascot of the Big Boy Restaurant franchise, which got its start in California in 1936. Original owner Bob Wian was trying to think of a name for his new burger, when chubby six-year...
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The Wrestling Team at the Most Homophobic College in the U.S.
The Cumberland Mountains, in the southeastern Appalachians, around where Kentucky, Tennessee, and Virgina meet, are isolated, sparcely populated, very depressed and very scary. This is where people...
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Niceville: Beefcake is Beefcake
Niceville sounds like a made-up name, but it's a real place, on the Florida Panhandle about an hour's drive east of Pensacola, near such real places as Choctaw Beach, Fort Walton Beach, Eglin Air Force...
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Johnny Kevorkian: Lost Wives and Muscles
Seeing the beefcake fest in Await Further Instructions, directed by Johnny Kevorkian, I wanted to see if there were further hunk-laden movies in his opus.It was hard to find biographical details....
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The Umbrella Academy
There are advantages to being sick: I've now watched the first three episodes of the the much-anticipated Netflix series The Umbrella Academy, and sampled the others to get a basic idea of the plot....
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7 Hunks from "Once Upon a Time," Season 7
Once Upon a Time, Season 7 is a blatant, unnecessary reboot.Season 1: Fairytale characters are living in our world, in the town of Storybrooke, with wiped memories and new identities.Season 7:...
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Wyoming Seminary: Laid-Back, Mellow Wrestlers with Swords
My first question is, "What is Sem?"My second is, what store has all those cool swords for sale?And mirrors for selfie-taking.Turns out to be Wyoming Seminary, which is neither in Wyoming nor a...
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The Top 12 Public Penises of East Asia
I visited Japan and Thailand many years ago, and took some classes in Mandarin Chinese, but otherwise East Asia is an undiscovered country. I'm not even sure what sights I want to see, except for the...
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Grammar School Beefcake
You thought I meant 10 year olds, didn't you?In the United States, "grammar school" is an old-fashioned term for "grade school," or more technically "elementary school," for kindergarten through sixth...
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The Naugy Boys
"Naugy Boys?" Naugy shoulds like it should be a legitimate adjective, like "Brawly" or "Brawny." When you google it, you get "Naughty Boys," which isn't at all the same thing.Surprise -- it's the...
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The Fate of "Gilligan's Island"
What Boomer kid doesn't get all wispy and nostalgic upon hearing "Just sit right back, and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip..."Gilligan's Island (1964-67) was an iconic Boomer tv series,...
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The High School Named after Bozz-Well
When I was in grade school, there was a kid in my class with the last name Boswell. He had dark sunken eyes with white eyelashes, which made him look sick all the time. He buttoned the top button of...
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Hialeah: Hispanic Beefcake in the Most Boring Town in America
The comedy series Hialeah (2018-) stars the mega-buffed Jordan Wall as a Jewish gringo who marries a Cubanita (Melissa Carcache) and moves in with her extended family (but fails to mention that they're...
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"Hialeah": Gay Panic TV Series
Hialeah is a short comedy series (6 episodes, each about 10 minutes long) now streaming on Facebook and Youtube, produced by and starring Melissa Carcache.She wanted to celebrate her home town with a...
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I Meet the Nazarene Teen Idol
When I was growing up in the Nazarene Church, twice a year, in the fall and the spring, we had a "revival": a full week of screeching, foot-stomping, Bible-thumping sermons by an evangelist who made...
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