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"Hialeah": Gay Panic TV Series

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Hialeah is a short comedy series (6 episodes, each about 10 minutes long) now streaming on Facebook and Youtube, produced by and starring Melissa Carcache.

She wanted to celebrate her home town with a series something like Que Pasa, USA, where English and Spanish were used interchangeably.

The premise: uptight Jewish photographer Kay (Jordan Wall) and Cubanita Mari (Melissa Carchache) meet and get married in Chicago. 

Lacking money, they decide to move back to Hialeah, Mari's home town, and move in with her estranged Cubano family.  But they must keep the marriage a secret, so Mari introduces him as a mere boyfriend.

Her parents and grandparents are still upset over Mari's decision to abandon the family and "study abroad," and now they are even more upset at her choice of a Gringo, who doesn't speak a word of Spanish (he keeps confusing Kay his name with que?)  Besides, he's Jewish, so he doesn't even have a full-sized penis  -- they cut the tip off, as Grandma mimics with a butcher knife

Although Jordan Wall is quite muscular, he plays Kay as a nebbish, intimidated by the vigor, muscularity, and aggressive physicality of the Cubanos, worried that he doesn't measure up as a man, in his penis, his muscles....

And his lack of homoerotic desire.

Each episode introduces a tidbit of Cubano culture, which somehow gets Kay in trouble.  Three involve homophobic panic:

He shares a bed with Mari's bodybuilder brother (Noel Mirabal), who wants to cuddle


He is suspicious of the attention of her bodybuilder ex-boyfriend (Danell Leyva).

While practicing an energetic dance, he accidentally ends up partnered with a boy.

Plus the secret that Kay and Mari are hiding from the family, that they are actually married, could just as easily be the secret that he's gay (although I suspect that la familia is less homophobic than Kay himself).

The cinematography is very bright and colorful, but I would have liked more location shots in Hialeah, to give us an actual feel for the city.  Almost every scene takes place in the Sanchez house. 

I would have also liked an actual gay character.  It would have been interesting to see how Kay and la familia respond when the gay subtext becomes text.

But at least there's substantial beefcake.  Even the older generation is rather buffed.





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