What to Watch on New Year's Eve

We didn't go out for New Year's Eve.  Bob is still recuperating (long story), I'm over fifty, and besides, where is there to go on the Plains?  A straight bar?  So we stayed in, had tacos, and watched tv.

"What shall we watch next?"  is always a problem.  Not that there aren't a lot of choices.  Netflix, Amazon Prime, and Vudu are always pushing long lists of recommendations at us. But we don't usually do dramas or cop shows, just comedies and sci-fi/fantasy, and we insist on gay characters, gay subtexts, or at least no focus on finding or winning the Girl of His Dreams.

Sometimes it's easy to weed out movies and tv series, but often it takes a little digging.  The Girl of His Dreams plotline is carefully hidden.  Here are the 10  "recommendations" we sifted through.

1. The Witcher.  "The witcher Geralt (Henry Cavill with long blond hair) struggles to find his place in a world in which people often prove more wicked than beasts."

Episode synopses: There are also characters named Ciri and Yennifer.  Does Geralt find True Love with either?

Trailer:  He gazes at at least three women, is in bed with one, and has to find another.  There don't appear to be any men in this world at all. Next!

2. V-Wars.  "A fast-spreading disease pits two best friends against each other in a fight for humanity's future. " The trailer shows the two best friends (both guys) each having sex with a woman.  One of them presses his forehead against a woman's forehead as she asks "What happens now?".  Next!

3.Marriage Story.  Are you kidding?  Next!



4. The Neighbor.  An ordinary guy, Javi (Quim Gutierrez), finds lis life turned upside down when he accidentally becomes a superhero.

Episode 1 Synopsis: He's having an argument with his girlfriend Lola when...

Not a good sign.

But in Episode 2, he becomes "fast friends" with José Ramon, and it's the two of them against Lola, who suspects their secret.

Downlow subtext? Maybe.


5. At Vitam.  "A cop and a troubled young woman....."  Next!

6. Good Witch. "Raisng her daughter in a small town, an enchanting widow with magical powers provokes the interest of a skeptical doctor (James Denton)."  Sounds like Bewitched without the gay symbolism.  Any gay characters?

Um...it was originally on the Hallmark Channel, so I guess not.  Next!






7. The End of the F**king World:  "A budding teen psychopath and a rebel hungry for adventure..."

Sounds good.  IMDB, tell me that they're both boys.

Nope: Alex Lawther, Jessica Barden.  Next!


8. MFKZ: "In Dark Meat City, a young man develops supernatural powers after an otherwise uneventful scooter accident."

Sounds good.  We actually start watching this one; Animated, good attention to detail.  A young man (voiced by Kenn Michael" complains that the city is terrible, everyone out to get each other.  He double-takes a girl, and tells us: "One little look would change everything."

Ugh!  Next!



9. Gringo:"A  dark comedy mixed with white-knuckle action and dramatic intrigue, explores the battle of survival for businessman Harold Soyinka (David Oyelowo) when he finds himself crossing the line from law-abiding citizen to wanted criminal."

Plot synopsis on wikipedia:  He is kidnapped by a drug cartel in Mexico, and must escape "alongside a hired mercenary."

Tell me that the mercenary is a guy.

Yep.

But the mercenary also dies, and Harold ends up with a woman named Sunny.  Next!

10. Yesterday.  "Jack discoves that he is the only person who remembers the music of  the Beatles."  The trailer shows him talking to a girl, smiling at a girl, knocking on a girl's door in the rain.  Next!

So, what did we end up watching?

Victor and Valentino: Two half-brothers, preteen operator Vic and stable "that's not a good idea" Val, live in a town plagued by Latin American paranormal beings: a vengeful coyote spirit named HueHue, a vengeful owl spirit named Lechuza, twin brothers from the underworld, the ghost of a soccer player (who befriends them), and so on.  And no Girls of Their Dreams in sight.