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The Biggest Bodybuilder on My Sausage Sighting List
When I lived in Upstate, I had a third floor apartment, directly above a crazy bodybuilder named Richard.He wasn't really a bodybuilder, but he had a respectable physique, big biceps and a thick, hairy...
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Cruising Waiters in West Hollywood, Florida, and New York
Ok, I've told you about 114 boyfriends, dates, hookups, and sharing experiences on four continents over a period of 36 years. I have a few more good dating/hookup stories, but it's about time to...
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Three's Company
Three's Company (1977-84) premiered at the height of the disco era, when sex was on everyone's mind, and it was about people having sex. Or, rather, about people thinking that other people were having...
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Best Friends
Before you come out, "best friend" is often code for "boyfriend," or someone who would be a boyfriend if only you knew that gay people existed. After you come out, you realize that a "best friend" is...
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The Top 10 Public Penises of Islam
Islam doesn't have quite the beefcake potential of Hinduism or Jainism. No androgynous gods, no naked holy men. The Quranic prohibition of idol-worship is often interpreted to mean "no human figures,...
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Top 10 Public Penises of the South
Many people in the northern states of the U.S. are afraid of the South, that vast territory that extends from Washington DC, 1200 miles to Miami Beach, and west 1000 miles to Kansas City. It's full of...
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Top Teenage and Twink Boyfriends
I don't really have an age preference, but it seems that when I was in my 20s and 30s, I usually ended up with guys 5-10 years older, and when I hit 40, guys 10 or more years younger. I'm over 50 now,...
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The Homoerotic Horror of Edgar Allan Poe
When I was a kid in the 1970s, Chuck Acri's Creature Feature broadcast a lot of very loose adaptations of Edgar Allan Poe stories: The House of Usher, The Pit and the Pendulum, Tales of Terror, The...
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My Top Sausage Sightings
A Sausage Sighting is a glimpse of a guy's beneath-the-belt gifts that doesn't go anywhere else -- no dating, no romance, no hooking up, not even a few minutes in the dark room at the Duplex Bar in...
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Henry Wadsworth Longfellow and the Blacksmiths with Brawny Arms
One of the poems parodied on Rocky and Bullwinkle was "The Village Smithy," by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow (1840):Under a spreading chestnut-tree the village smithy stands.The smith, a mighty man is he,...
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Cruising in the Navajo Nation
I grew up around Native Americans, at the annual pow wow and through visiting relatives (my Cousin Joe is half Potawatomie). But I was never with a Native American guy, through all my years in college...
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The Day I Turned Japanese
When I was growing up in Rock Island, almost every kid had a "homeland": their grandparents or great-grandparents came from Sweden, Germany, or Belgium, or less commonly Greece, Poland, France, Italy,...
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Rupert Grint's Biceps Drive Boys Mad
In Driving Lessons (2006), Julie Walters plays a free spirit actress who takes an interest in shy teenager Rupert Grint. She originally thinks that her protege is gay, so she knows that gay teenagers...
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The Full Monty
In the grim industrial town of Sheffield, ne'er do wells Gaz (Robert Carlyle, center) and Dave (Mark Addy) come up with an innovative way to make money -- they'll perform as male strippers, and make up...
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My First Indian Sausage Sighting
Dad always claimed that he was a quarter Indian, from the Potawatomi tribe of southern Michigan. But he we didn't mean by blood: when his big sister Nora married a Potawatomi man (my Uncle Henry), he...
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12 Unexpected Nickelodeon Teen Hunks
Of the three major juvenile tv networks, The Disney Channel has nearly sewn up the beefcake. But Nickelodeon has its share, too, gleefully displaying spectacular pecs and abs not only of the main...
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36 Hours of Cruising at Lambert International Airport
I don't hook up in public, period. No parks, no nature preserves, no secluded hotel restrooms, no booths at the Pleasure Palace. No way, no how.But back in college in the Midwest in the 1980s, I...
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The Life of Riley: Bullying Boys into Girl-Craziness
Before World War II, teenage boys were expected to be concerned with the gang, or with one special pal, and think of girls as "poison." Those boys who expressed an interest in girls prior to graduating...
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Dewey Martin: Forgotten Screen Hunk
When I was a kid in the 1960s, the Mean Boys made fun of everybody's name, but a few made them downright apoplectic: Clyde, Abner, Dewey. Especially Dewey, since that was the name of the proprietor of...
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20 Preachers, Priests, and Religious Guys on My Dating List
I have always been attracted to religious guys. There's something about a devotion to the spiritual world that makes your presence in the physical world especially erotic. Maybe the paradoxical...
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