Just Another Night of Gay Tease TV

Last night Amazon Prime suggested that I would like The Vanishing Shadow (2019), a homage to old time movie serials.  I watched the first five minutes, marveling at the lengths the producers went through to match the old-time serial style-- even the title fonts-- before getting suspicious.  Turns out that The Vanishing Shadow is a real old-time movie serial from 1934.  Amazon lied about the year to make us think that it was a clever homage.

Please. if I want to watch an old movie serial, it will be Buster Crabbe bulging as Buck Rogers.

Then it thought i would like Last Call  (2015): Underachieving siblings Phil (Ryan Hansen) and Danny (Travis Van Winkle, left) are forced to run the family pub to save their eccentric uncle from "jail and financial ruin."

But when I search for a plot synopsis or reviews, I get:
Last Call: With Jeremy Irons as Scott Fitzgerald and Sissy Spacek as Zelda.

When I add the year 2015,I get:
Last Call:An indie drama about a suicidal alcoholic who calls the wrong number while trying to reach a helpline. And:
Last Call: A horror film starring Terry Alexander of Day of the Dead

Finally, when the word "call" starts to sound strange from overuse, I add Travis Van Winkle and find a wikipedia entry for Last Call (2012). Amazon lied about the year again.  

The entry doesn't have a plot synopsis, but I find a trailer.  No kissing, but lots of girls in bikinis tending bar and doing strip shows. They must turn the pub into a boob ranch.  No way!

Next Amazon suggests The Last Lovecraft.  The last living relative of Cthulhu Mythos writer H. P. Lovecraft must save the world from the real eldritch horrors from beyond time.  I'm interested in Lovecraft.  There is a plot synopsis on wikipedia: no girls mentioned.  No girls in the cast.  Charlie and Jeff (Kyle Davis, Devin McGinn) stay together at the end. Probably heterosexual life partners, not a gay couple, but good enough.

When I search for Devin McGinn on Google Images,this photo pops up, labeled The Worst Team. Not bad.




Ok,
And this one, labeled Unicorn City.

And this one, labeled 2013 Movies Preview

They have the beefcake sewed up, so ok.

Scene 1: Two guys are enjoying "their retirement" on a boat.  Obviously a gay couple!  An unseen but bloody horror kills them both. Darn.

Scene 2: At Miskatonic University (yeah!), a professor ofeldritch horrors is summoned by the others in his cult.  The Deep Ones are awakening, and they need to act fast.

Scene 3:  Kyle and Jeff are working schlub jobs at a call center, hoping that their comic book will get sold, and they'll be rich and able to live their dreams.....like a blow job from the hot girl that just walked by.

Ugh! Gay tease!  Next!

How about Unicorn City?  "Voss entices local games to create a utopia, but Paradise is disrupted when his nemesis lays claim to the city and his True Love."

Ugh!  Next!

Oh, it's bedtime.