Missouri City: 2 Hours from Hell-fer-Sartain

I follow the twitter feed of former Disney teen Doug Brochu.  I don't remember why -- maybe a gay subtext in one of his Disney performances.  He doesn't tweet much, but last night he retweeted a plea from someone named Billy to patronize his father's donut shop, Billy's Donuts in Missouri City, Texas.

Missouri City?  Never heard of it.

Turns out to be a southwest suburb of Houston Hell-fer-Sartain, just beyond the South Houston Tollway, 18 miles from downtown (which, given the worst traffic congestion in the known universe, means about a 2 hour drive).  Named  "Missouri City" to draw settlers from Missouri, which never happened.

74,000 people, up from 50,000 in 2000, mostly refugees from Houston who still drive there to work.  50% black, 16% Asian.  Median family income $81,000.  Full of ritzy subdivisions with names like Williams Grant, Grant Lake, Colony Grant, Colony Park, Lake Colony, Heritage Colony, and the Enclave.

With all that money floating around, you'd expect some classy shops and restaurants.  But the main street, which has the pedestrian name Highway 5, features Taco Bell, Wendy's, Denny's, Chipotle, Papa John's Pizza, Pizza Hut, and of course Billy's Donuts.

The churches seem rather on the fundamentalist side: Maranatha Full Gospel Church, Christ Temple of Deliverance, the Abiding Faith Center, the Living Word Faith Center.

Plus two Indian Orthodox Churches.  The Malankara Orthodox Church, rooted in south India, has 30,000 members in the U.S., most in  Texas.

Life in Hell-fer-Sartain takes a lot of divine intervention.





Other points of interest: According to Wikipedia, the "Missouri City Antenna Farm," a group of radio and tv towers all clustered together.

Sounds desolate.




No colleges, but lots of high schools.  It was hard to tell where the city limits ended,but I think I counted Stafford, Dulles, Thurgood Marshall, Willowridge, Lake Olympia, Hightower, Progressive, and Willow Creek.

This is an athlete at Elkins praying before a match.  Or after.







I think this swimmer is from Dulles.
















I was interested in Progressive High School, but an internet search revealed conflicting information.  Is it public or private?   Is it for advanced students or "at risk" learning-challenged students?  Is transgender wrestler Mack Beggs a student there, or not?  Are these swimmers students there, or not?











I don't know where this powerlifter is from.  Maybe Missouri City, Missouri.

That's right, there's another one.  Missouri City, Missouri, on the banks of the Missouri River, about 20 miles east of Kansas City, Missouri, where you can go to Missouri City High School.

Please tell me it's not in Missouri County.