Wayne, New Jersey: A Beefcake Desert

Every September academic job openings begin to appear in the journals.  I always check them out, to see if there are any gay studies positions in gay neighborhoods -- the impossible dream, I know -- and William Paterson University in Wayne, New Jersey always has job openings in my field.  Year after year.

Meaning a high turnover, people staying for a year or two and then vanishing, a sure sign of toxicity in a department: hostile, gossiping, back-stabbing faculty, micromanaging dean.  Run away!

I never bothered to check it out: the name makes it sound like a private, for-profit college, one of those diploma mills that give you a degree for $5000.  Turns out that it is a public university  with 10,000 students, founded as a "normal school" in 1855.

I still get a bad feeling about William Paterson University.  Maybe some beefcake photos would make it more appealing.

There weren't any!  No wrestling, and this was the only male swimmer.  Nice physique, but it looks like he's wearing lavender panty hose.  Just a little on the girly side.

Well, maybe I could find some beefcake possibilities in town.



Wayne, New Jersey, population 55,000, is in Passaic County, about 20 miles from Manhattan (an hour by bus). 

There's a Crossfit, and an L.A. Fitness, but the only photos I found were of women.

There's a Boxing Club, but the only photos I found were of kids.

Where's all of the guidos, the insouciant muscle gods we saw on Jersey Shore?





Wayne has several parochial high schools: Al-Ghazali (Muslim), DePaul (Catholic), Pioneer (Turkish). 

Nothing.

Wayne Hills High, on the north side, has 1300 students.  It offers swimming -- photos only of girls. 

And wrestling -- only long shots, no closeups. 

Um...cross country?  Track? Volleyball? Bowling?

Football?  Here's a fully clothed player.






I even checked his Facebook page.  This was his only shirtless photo. 

Wayne Valley High School on the south side, you're my last hope.





Founded in 1952, it has 1,300 students.  It doesn't even offer swimming.

But it has wrestling, with a Facebook page.

Mostly athletes posing with their families.  At least you can see the hot dads and brothers.












But if you page down -- way, way down, to 2015 -- you get to the singlets.

Sky-blue, displaying some pecs and biceps, and very tight in the nether region.


















Lots of them, with faces so similar, they might be the same guy. 




















Not that I mind looking at him over and over again.

Especially since he's apparently got the only gaze-worthy physique in the whole town of Wayne.

I repeat -- where are the guidos?