I put "No Daddy fetishes" in my online hookup profile, because otherwise I would get pick-up lines like "Daddy, I've been bad! Punish me!" every five seconds.
Daddy fetishists are everywhere. Half the twinks I've met are interested in being dominated by an older guy with a deep voice and chest hair.
But last night was the first time I ever met a Grandpa fetishist.
"Hi, Grandpa!" a twink with the screen name Friends First said.
I assumed that he was just trying to be mean, so I didn't respond.
Then: "Do you have a present for me, Grandpa?"
"I'm not old enough to have a grandson of legal age, dagnabit," I answered.
But then I calculated. I graduated from high school in May 1978. If I...ugh...impregnated a woman on the night of my high school graduation, my son would be born in late January 1979. He would graduate from high school in 1997. If he...ugh..... impregnated a woman on the night of his high school graduation, my grandson would be born in January 1998,
And be 18 years old today. Legal.
The 17 year old I dated last week was young enough to be my grandson.
I contacted Friends First again. "Ok, I'm just barely old enough to be a grandfather, if both me and my son had kids as teenagers. But I have a 48" chest and 16" biceps, and I can bench press 300. Not many grandpas can do that."
"The hot grandpas can. Will you let me sit on your lap, Grandpa?"
The full story, with nude photos and sexual situations, is on Tales of West Hollywood.